Daily Life Entry

I learned today in my meeting with you when a bunch of things cracked open inside of me that I'm very oppressive to myself. Which is rude, really. As much as I talk about my "oxygen mask" time and the idea that the universe is an infinite supplier if you only ask for what you need, I don't typically follow my own rules. I don't take time away from people, because I diminish my own hurt. And I don't ask for what I need because I feel rude saying that I would "need" something when so many people need so much.

So today was a rough day of fighting my self-oppression. A lot of rocks in my chest got busted open and turned into some awkward crying. And then they turned into a little self-righteousness on the drive home. And then they turned into a beer and a letter that nobody will ever read but needed to be written. So now there are no more big rocks. There might be some tiny pebbles, but I'm hoping to breathe deep, tell the universe what I need (which is to find out what I need--how meta!), and probably end my homework time early and read for pleasure. 

Tonight will end with a gratitude list, and tomorrow will begin with a few deep breaths and maybe a one-woman lip-sync rock concert. There's enough oppression out there without forcing it on myself. Thanks for the revelation, Dr. B!